Still feeling bummed

I don't know what's up with me. I have not been feeling myself for the past couple of weeks. I have been been he typical emotional eater. I have gained 4 pounds. I am so disappointed with myself. I guess if I have to look on the bright side of this, I have identified what I have been doing and know how to fix it. It is just so frustrating because I am so close to a major milestone. I can TASTE the , 100 pound weight loss and now it's even further away from me. What's wrong with me? The last 20 pounds have been so hard. I have been trying to lose them since July. Well, I know what happened in July, we all do. "The Break-up" happened. I have been struggling with the weight loss since that point. 


I did run today. It wasn't a great run. I ran 3.2 miles in just over 40 minutes. The State Park does has a lot of hills, so I guess it wasn't that bad. I felt good, and more importantly I only stopped for maybe a minute stretched out over that 40 minutes. I felt proud about that. Tomorrow is non-running day for me and Saturday I am off from working out all together. Sunday is the day of the five miler. I am so nervous. I know I can do it. I need to find somewhere else to run. I wonder if there's somewhere else near here that's pretty flat, yet safe, that won't be too hard on my knees. Ugh, my knees are really starting to feel beat up from all these miles I am putting on them. Think about it; I am still pretty heavy. I have all that weight and pressure on them for a long period of time. I am just so achy. My back hurts. I just don't want to give-up. The thought has passed my mind when I can barely stand up because my back is in so much pain. I have to do this. I only have 9 weeks left! NINE WEEKS! That can't be right. {checking calender} It's not... I have SEVEN more weeks. I guess that's better. Well it's less because I have a 5K at the end of this month. Man alive, what in the hell have I signed myself up for? Oh man. I better get to bed. Long day of sitting in the teacher's lounge. I am SOOOOO ready to get back in the classroom! This is one of the reason's why!

I found this in a book earlier this week when I was working on curriculum with a few colleagues. Sometimes you just know you're doing something right in life. 


=)